Rob and the 840 to Whitby.
Rob and the 840 to Whitby.
This Is Rob:
This is the 840 to Whitby:
Rob is nice.
Bobby can be nice, but needs to try harder.
They first met as skinny teenagers in the halcyon days of their ‘careers’ at the Legal and General Assurance Society in 1965.
Both were christened Robert in the 1940s. A name that was very popular then. Still is, but more so in its derivative, Bob. Or Rob.
Both had countless nicknames. For Rob, Robert became:
Rob/Bob/Catty/Catty Boy, Trebor. (Surname Catt … work).
Chuckle Junior (golf … there was a Chuckle Senior).
For Bobby, Robert became:
Bob/Bobby (school and work).
Trebor/Sitch/Roberto/Bobby Ballcock (work).
Bobster/Bobstar (old work colleagues).
Bobby (nowadays and bears).
Rob is nice. Even openly reads the Daily Bleedin Mail (DBM) with equanimity and no shame at all.
Bobby hates the DBM and everybody who reads it. Or says he does.
Rob is nice. Despite Bobby’s ranting and insults, he remains calm. For he knows a secret. Bobby is a secret admirer of the DBM.
Bobby is offended, but admits that some really good articles have come from the DBM. He knows this, because Rob sends him anything he thinks will interest him. This is because he is nice. Diddley did the same in reading the Mail Online and sending articles to Bobby!
Bobby isn’t very nice. Despite his good fortune, he still tells Rob that the DBM is a rat infested, sewer soaked, slimy, lie ridden excuse for a newspaper and sends Rob helpful advice.
How Much I Dislike the Daily Mail.
I would rather
Eat Quavers that are six week’s stale,
Blow dry the hair of Gareth Bale,
Listen to the songs of Jimmy Nail,
Than read one page of the Daily Mail.
If I were bored
In a waiting room in Perivale,
On a twelve hour trip on British Rail
Or a world circumnavigational sail,
I would not read the Daily Mail.
I would happily read
The complete works of Peter Mayle,
The autobiography of Dan Quayle,
Selected scripts from Emmerdale,
But I couldn’t ever read the Daily Mail.
Far better to
Stand outside in a storm of hail,
Be blown out to sea in a powerful gale
Then swallowed by a humpback whale
Than have to read the Daily Mail.
I were blind
And it was the only thing
I still would not read the Daily Mail.
Bobby is also a hypocrite because he posts articles from the DBM as his own. Like the 840 bus. Did you wonder when we would get to that?
As you know, we love Whitby. With Diddley and the grandchildren we always drove. Nowadays, with just the two of us, we go by train to York. And then it’s England’s most scenic bus route to Whitby. Two hours of glorious countryside on a spectacular bus. Bus pass for Bobby. Free for bears. It was voted “The Most Scenic Bus Route in Britain” and the article printed in the DBM. And, of course, forwarded to Bobby by that nice chap Rob.
(Play the video for the real atmosphere of this bus route).
Joining the bus outside York station, the pictures that follow were all from the top deck of the 840 to Whitby on one single journey.
Bobby reads the “I”. He could get the DBM free with his shopping in Waitrose. But couldn’t bear the ignominy if someone found out. So he relies on Rob.
Rob who is really nice putting up with Bobby’s two-faced cheek.
We are reminded by the Gentle Author that the gardens of Spitalfields are open on 16 June. Including 31 Fournier Street.
Lighting a Candle for Diddley.
And its another excuse to play the most famous bus music of all:
(Written in Pret A Manger in Islington during a thunderstorm over a cup of tea and a pain aux raisin. Twenty minutes. (text). Proving it was either easy, brilliant or rubbish. So bleedin what? Brian Bennett wrote “Summer Holiday” in twenty minutes on a bus. There is also a lie in this blog. First one who notices gets a Mars Bar).
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